1. |
Mother
03:30
|
|||
|
I crumpled up the creeds of Man
And ran out into the rain
Where I mourned for my lost virtue
But mourned more for what remained.
I’d give my grief to God
But I’m just too proud to pray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
I’m the busted bulb in your lighthouse,
I’m the guilt dashed on your cliff.
I read about perpetuity,
I hope it’s just a myth.
Some people talk of progress
But all I see is decay.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
I pin my hopes on the future
Like martyrs to a tree
But they haven’t yet built the religion
That can hold me.
I hear tomorrow will be better,
I heard the same thing yesterday.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
Each night I go to sleep
The way a Christian goes to lions.
God can take my body,
I’m leaving my soul to science.
I’m sure He had a plan in Man
But something’s gone agley.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
There’s a stranger in this mirror,
Or is it just stained glass?
I’ve changed my face so many times,
I wish I could change the past.
There are more epithets than cigarettes
Stubbed out in my ashtray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
I’m a gentleman, a charlatan,
Prose from a poison pen.
I lately made a big mistake:
Told the truth and sounded fake.
My friends are all long gone,
There’s none left to betray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
I keep my guardian angel close
But always gagged and bound.
Will someone please let me know
The way off this misery-go-round?
I long to see the spin on me
In St Peter’s dossier.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
I’m told there’ll be no jobs until somebody dies
But a salary is just another word
For “consolation prize”
So I’m plodding through Perdition
Like some latter day Dante
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
Now I’ve told you all my thoughts
But I still haven’t seen that penny.
You asked me if there were bad times.
Yeah… MANY.
I long to say I love you
But it’s such a damned cliché.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?
|
||||
2. |
I Want To Know More
03:10
|
|||
|
We both know love comes with conditions
Collusions, collisions, unplanned revisions
And small print.
Darling we’re no different,
It’s you and me or you and someone else.
Between the womb and the tomb
There’s not a lot of room
To be the people we want to be.
Now I’m all rage,
I’ve forgotten how to act my age
Everything is slipping away from me.
Baby, I am the man you’re holding on to right now
But tell me who is the man you’re holding on for?
I want to know more.
Joking apart, don’t you dare enjoy the start,
We need to save our smiles for the happy ending.
I’ve put myself through hell
But these thoughts won’t think themselves
And I’m wondering if you’re just pretending.
Now my inner child is watching
So I’ve put him up for adoption
Because I suspect he’s up to something really bad.
And you still give me chills
You’ve got me hooked through the gills
But love never stopped anyone feeling sad.
Baby, I am the man you’re holding on to right now
But tell me who is the man you’re holding on for?
I want to know more.
It’s just the echo of a memory
Of a shadow of a regret
And the regrets are all for things
I haven’t even done yet.
I’m just a privileged boy
Battling for his right to a little misery
Wishing you were kissing me
And wishing it meant more.
I am the man you’re holding on to right now
But tell me who is the man you’re holding on for?
|
||||
3. |
Tonight
03:02
|
|||
|
You had me packed like an artefact
In the cotton of your ambition
But there was something in my condition
That made me long for a little more.
You had me squeezed for at least
The last two years of marriage
But some mistaken adage
Made you blind to what was in store.
I’ll be waiting up
When you get home tonight
I made a cat-flap for my jealousy
So it could roam where it wanted.
It had a sorry tail that it flaunted
But every night it still came home
(Unlike you) but I made do
With those slivers of deceit,
Those little tributes left at my feet
For which your conscience will atone.
I’ll be waiting up
When you get home tonight
Now I’m so fraught and overwrought
Like a bird among the rafters,
But it ain’t laughter that I’m after,
Just a grim and knowing sneer.
As for you, when I’m through
You’ll be sore down to your ligaments.
There ain’t no love without disfigurement,
I’ve known no fondness without fear.
I’ll be waiting up
When you get home tonight
|
||||
4. |
The Debtor's Wife
04:17
|
|||
|
Well it began with a gift
And died with a debt
But if redemption’s on the cards
Well it hasn’t happened yet.
He said if you need anything from me
All you’ve got to do is ask,
But he wore that sincerity
Like a halloween mask.
I owe, I owe
I owe so many folk
I’ve got nowhere to go.
I owe, I owe
Won’t nobody help me get out of this hole?
His words were sweet as honey
But that honey attracted flies.
I know he never meant to really love me
He just wanted to synchronise.
I said beware those things you sow
Because one day you’ve got to reap them.
He said what’s the use in making promises darling?
You’ve only got to keep them.
I owe, I owe
I owe so many folk
I’ve got nowhere to go.
I owe, I owe
Won’t nobody help me get out of this hole?
And each morning he’d fall through my door,
Frail, foul and thin,
Beauty may be all around us
But there’s certainly nothing good within him.
I know a gambler’s got no ties,
Just a suitcase and a trunk,
But I soon came to realise
There are more days behind us than in front.
I owe, I owe
I owe so many folk
I’ve got nowhere to go.
I owe, I owe
Won’t nobody help me get out of this hole?
Now the stitching has frayed
And all the cupboards are bare,
He’s got his head in his hands
But he’s lost the luxury of despair.
It’s true I ain’t possessive
And it’s true I don’t need wealth,
But if he wants to be a martyr now
I’ll hammer the nails in myself.
I owe, I owe
I owe so many folk
I’ve got nowhere to go.
I owe, I owe
Won’t nobody help me get out of this hole?
|
||||
5. |
It Hurts So Much To Hold
03:01
|
|||
|
It seems to me
Like you’ve got some plans
Up your sleeves,
But I’ll be damned
If all those little things
Don’t come to call again,
Demand to be let in,
Haunt us all now and then.
But hate wears a harness of hope,
Round its ears, round its eyes
Round its throat.
It feeds on what we know
And spits it right back out.
It hurts so much to hold
But I ain’t about to let go now.
Our love was like an island
But an island with no shore.
You kept passing me those apples
But all I ever get is the core.
Some day you’re going to go,
But don’t desert me now.
It hurts so much to hold
But I ain’t about to let go now.
And if there’s one thing that I know
It’s that the heart will drive you mad,
Just look at all the happy endings
Wandering round looking so sad:
They’re waiting down below
For love to dig them out.
It hurts so much to hold
But I ain’t about to let go now.
A slave to the age sold us a lie
With a cold and craven chorus
Congregated close behind.
The song started low
But ended very loud
It hurts so much to hold
But I ain’t about to let go now.
|
||||
6. |
Waiting For Bad News
04:04
|
|||
|
I’m waiting for bad news to come
Here on my own
I know which way it’s coming from
I’ve left every single light on
And the doors wide open
I’m hoping
For bad news to come
I’m waiting for bad news to come
My toes frozen numb
Teeth bared to the gums
Some things will always go wrong
But some go nowhere
I don’t care
I’m just here
Waiting for bad news to come
For someday or someone
To somehow be begun
It’s all news here yet nothing seems young
And everything wrong
I long for bad news
I just wanted you to want me darling
I just wanted you to want me darling
I just wanted you to want me darling
What did you have to go and need me for?
I’m waiting for bad news to come
Dismantling the hours as they roll on and on
Pondering the deeds left undone
The words spoken but not sung
While I’m waiting for bad news to come
There’s more grey in your eyes
Than there is in your hair
We’ve got plenty of time
I just don’t know where
And it had to be you
But did it have to be now
And did it have to be here
With bad news coming round?
I just wanted you to want me darling
What did you have to go and need me for?
Now bad news sits outside
And taps on the glass
It says be true to my memory
Don’t be true to my past
And as the poetry of adolescence
Meets the bullet points of adulthood
There are no signposts, just suggestions
And none of them any good
So we wake without desire
And turn our collars up to the rain
Because bad news seems a lot better
Than always just staying the same
And now the lights are all fading
And I’m tired of explaining
I’m waiting and waiting
And waiting and waiting
I just wanted you to want me darling
What did you have to go and need me for?
|
||||
7. |
You're On Your Own Now
04:00
|
|||
|
I was never a lonely boy
You can never be alone with guilt
I’ve delighted in the debris
Of all the things I’ve ever built
I’ve seen that every blossom
Will some day come to wilt
So what’s the sense in us
All getting so upset?
Because a story
Is the only thing I know
That gets smaller as it unfolds
So many are sung
About those who die young
Not those of us getting old
And though you don’t need
To believe
In every tale you’re told
Here’s one I guarantee
You won’t forget
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
And all you own
It means nothing to me
The tragedy is that you can’t end it all
You can only end yourself
But if things start getting bad
Well at least you’ve got your health
And if you don’t let your imagination
Run away with you
It might run away with someone else
And you’re going to need it where you’re going kid
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
And all you own
It means nothing to me
So son take my advice
Don’t wait your turn and don’t play nice
Leave the sugar and take the spice
Always keep your prayers concise
And don’t waste your time worrying
About who’s getting the biggest slice
Just take the entire cake and run
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
You’re on your own now
And all you own
It means nothing to me
Quit waving your arms
In an empty world
And saving your breath
For a joke that’s been told
Spare me your epilogues
And spare me your fears
As the lack screams out
It rings long in your ears
You’re on your own.
|
||||
8. |
I Ain't Done
03:58
|
|||
|
Where the hell have all my old friends gone?
Where did they hide when our twenties were spent?
Because I ain’t done being young,
No I ain’t done with that yet.
I don’t care if you all think I’m wrong.
I don’t care what those other people say.
Because I ain’t done being young,
No, today is not that day.
Centuries turn but Fate tends to twist,
Forget the hand of time,
Worry more about its fists
Because its dice are all loaded
And I ain’t hedging my bets,
I ain’t done,
I ain’t done being young just yet.
I ain’t done with the doing,
I ain’t turning out the light,
I will not go gentle into that good night,
My rack it ain’t ruined,
My race it ain’t run,
I ain’t done, I ain’t done, I ain’t done.
Beware of that happy little bubble you’ve bought
Because a safety net is just like any other net
When you are caught.
And though I know
Every deed has a debt,
I ain’t done,
I ain’t done being young just yet.
No one yearns for Summer
Until they’ve felt the chill,
Just like any guilty pleasure
Depends mostly on the Guilt.
So we pass the time
Between us like a bomb,
Screaming I ain’t done
I ain’t done being young.
I ain’t done with potential
And I don’t care who agrees
Because I ain’t ready to start living
My death by degrees.
My tide ain’t stemmed
And my spin ain’t spun,
I ain’t done, I ain’t done, I ain’t done
I ain’t done, I ain’t done.
Maybe I wanted kids of my own.
Maybe that’s one little thing I regret.
But I ain’t done being young,
No I ain’t done with that yet.
So smother your sympathy
And reign in your remorse,
Don’t talk to me of “middle age”
Call it “the main course”
Because only lovers settle down
And only gamblers settle up,
I ain’t done being young
I ain’t ever going to stop.
I ain’t done with the folly,
I ain’t done with the fight,
I’m living tall as a story,
I’m living broad as daylight.
So unsheathe your daggers
And unfurl your cloaks
And save me a seat
In a hell that’s well stoked.
Tend to the weeds
That have grown around your thoughts
Fasten the tight ropes and pull them up taut.
Set us on a course for where the sun never sets,
Cos I ain’t done I ain’t done I ain’t done
I ain’t done I ain’t done I ain’t done
I ain’t done being young just yet.
|
||||
9. |
Year Of The Bitch
02:43
|
|||
|
Next year is the year of the bitch.
No one will get lucky,
No one will get rich
And we’ll be telling lies
When we say we don’t know why
We talk about this world as if it’s all in bits.
Next year is the year of the bitch.
The panicking will peak at a piercing pitch
And everyone will hate
And obsess about their weight
And waste away in want
For the things that they once ditched.
Where were you when we changed our minds,
Put our ideals on ice and our hearts into brine?
Where were you when we fell?
Where were you?
Next year is the year of the bitch.
We’ll package up our lives
And take them to the tips
And sit back in our chairs,
Assuming fancy airs,
As it all falls round our ears, drip by drip.
People all just stood around
Watering their lawns as the cities fell down;
I could barely make out the time
As the air turned to ash and the sea to slime.
Where were you when we changed our minds,
Put our ideals on ice and our hearts into brine?
Where were you when we fell?
Where were you?
Next year is the year of the bitch.
We’ll swallow all their lies
Like hungry little chicks,
Every consonant and vowel:
Wretched, rank and foul,
We’ll cling to every word
Like tiny little ticks.
Where were you when we changed our minds,
Put our ideals on ice and our hearts into brine?
Where were you when we fell?
Where were you when we lost ourselves?
Where were you?
|
||||
10. |
Low
04:28
|
|||
|
I was just a child in the drama of the big bad world,
A sorry silhouette in the smoke as it curled,
Existing on the edge of some great idea,
Trying to find my way but the way wasn’t clear.
I was wearing my thoughts like a new tattoo,
Acting like a leper and thinking of you
Because the rage withered in me when you took me in,
I’d been running against Love without wanting to win.
I’ve been crushing all the crawling things
Creeping around the hole
And now they’re only creeping below.
I was swallowed by the spectre of a long slain spite
That gnawed upon my nerves with a savage appetite,
It stripped away the structure of our pretty pretense,
You know we never should’ve had the right
To so much innocence.
Crushing all the crawling things
Creeping around the hole
Now they’re only creeping below.
Everybody’s acting like they’re born again,
Like I’m the very last of a pagan strain.
So I’ve been digging in the dirt
For something decent to say,
Trying to think about “the now”
While trapped in the everyday.
Crushing all the crawling things
Creeping around the hole
Now they’re only creeping below.
I want to know who
Would want me to feel this cheap
I want to know why
The road stretching out is so steep
I want to know what
Could cause this wretched malaise
I want to know where
Your God goes on His holidays.
Crushing all the crawling things
Creeping around the hole
Now they’re only creeping below.
And like a hound full of fleas
Sinking down in the sea,
I’m drowning in all this Love
And I hope you drown with me.
These nightmares don’t cause me no grief,
I don’t wish away visions
That make real life a relief.
Though I’m certain this circus must end,
Don’t you dare tell me when.
You wanted a rose
But I gave you a thistle,
Every day I shave close
But you still make me bristle,
If you need anything
Just give a little whistle,
You know how to whistle don’t you?
So we’re popping the tics
And we’re stoning the crows,
We’re down in the Styx
And it’s your turn to row,
We’re crushing the crawling things
Creeping below.
Now we’re creeping below.
These nightmares don’t cause me no grief,
I don’t wish away visions
That make real life a relief.
Though I’m certain this circus must end,
Don’t you dare tell me when.
|
||||
11. |
All That's In Between
04:22
|
|||
|
The book of my life may be second hand
But you may still find a few petals
Pressed between its pages.
I’ll give you all the ellipses and ampersands
If you just save your etceteras for me.
I knew you were crying in the next room
But I feigned a deafness
To the patter of those tears.
I tried to find inspiration in a vacuum
But I lacked the provision of years.
Our lives were elsewhere and we knew it,
So with a sundial for a compass
We turned away from the light.
But between opening that door
And walking through it
The roads all receded from sight.
And I know
I’m not all that you wanted
But I’ll be all that you need
For the day, the night
And everything in between.
I will never feel easy in this skin
So I will only accept happiness
When there is nothing left to long for.
I’ve no time for the times we are living in,
They are just a tourniquet
For glory days gone before.
I hear regrets are always the last to leave
As we move further away
From the memories that define us.
You can take hope
And you can take heaven,
But not simultaneously.
Our footprints don’t remain long behind us.
I’m not all that you wanted
But I’ll be all that you need
For the day, the night
And everything in between.
You said you’d rather see the devil in its true form
Than embodied in the deeds of men and boys.
Don’t wish these worries dead,
Prefer them unborn;
This isn’t silence,
We’re just waiting for noise.
I’m not all that you wanted
But I’ll be all that you need
For the day, the night
And everything in between.
Yes the book of my life is second hand
But what Fate annotates can never be erased.
How long will I stay?
As long as I can stand.
Always, always, always.
I’m not all that you wanted
But I’ll be all that you need
For the day, the night
And everything in between.
|
||||
Louis Barabbas & The Bedlam Six Manchester
Between 2006-2016 the Bedlams relentlessly peddled their peculiar brand of Dirt-Swing, capturing the imaginations of every species of listenership, winning support from the likes of Supergrass, The Mighty Boosh, Har Mar Superstar, UB40, Mark Steel, The Hell’s Angels and BBC Radio, inspiring stage invasions, dancing in the aisles and a confused mixture of exhaustion and bonhomie wherever they went ... more
If you like Louis Barabbas & The Bedlam Six, you may also like:
Bedlam Solo (acoustic album)
by Louis Barabbas
supported by 21 fans who also own “Youth”
go to album
Gentle Songs Of Ceaseless Horror
by Louis Barabbas
supported by 19 fans who also own “Youth”
go to album
Jocasta: A Musical Tragedy
by Louis Barabbas
supported by 15 fans who also own “Youth”
Trop difficile de choisir un seul morceau tellement ce double album est d'une richesse inouïe...On passe par Broadway, Montmartre, les plaines du Far West, puis dans un petit cabaret, etc. sans jamais rien perdre de l'unité propre au chef d'oeuvre. Que dire de plus ?
go to album
From London comes this beguilingly mysterious folk-based album with skeletal acoustics and melodies.
go to album
Nina Nastasia & Jeff MacLeod join forces as Jolie Laide, playing noir-y songs that glow soft as moonlight.
go to album
24th Street Blues
by Tom Heyman
Tom Heyman documents life in San Francisco circa 2023, refusing to succumb to easy characterization & instead capturing the city’s nuance.
go to album
Project Fear: Four Songs About Modern Politics
by Louis Barabbas
supported by 10 fans who also own “Youth”
go to album
